30 Of The Best Dad Jokes Loved By Kids

Dad jokes are so wonderfully cringe that they’re almost perfect. Add in how dads always seem to finish a joke with a "badum tish" and a hearty laugh at their own jokes, and everyone can hardly help cracking a smile.

We all have our favourites, and dad’s often dip back into the same well, pulling out their greatest hits but they never fail to make us laugh. Here are our top 30 best dad jokes loved by kids for those dads who are still filling their well.

  1. What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.
  2. I’m friends with almost all the letters of the alphabet. I just don’t know Y.
  3. If money doesn’t grow on trees, then why do banks have branches?
  4. The wedding was so beautiful, even the cake was in tiers.
  5. I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.
  6. What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.
  7. I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.
  8. Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use a honeycomb.
  9. I just paid €50 for a belt that doesn’t fit — what a huge waist!
  10. I'd avoid the sushi if I were you — it's a little fishy!
  11. What did the slow tomato say to the others? Don't worry; I'll ketchup.
  12. Why is Peter Pan always flying? Because he Neverlands.
  13. Two peanuts went walking down the street. One was assaulted.
  14. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho Cheese.
  15. What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna One, Anna Two.
  16. What do you call a beehive without an exit? Unbelievable.
  17. What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.
  18. Why can’t you trust stairs? They’re always up to something.
  19. What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved.
  20. What did the fisherman say to the magician? Pick a cod, any cod.
  21. What do you call a pony with a sore throat? A little hoarse.
  22. I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey, but then I turned myself around.
  23. What do you call a toothless bear? A gummy bear.
  24. I’m so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.
  25. Why was Cinderella thrown off the football team? She ran away from the ball.
  26. I have a fear of speed bumps. I'm slowly getting over it.
  27. Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
  28. Did you hear the rumour about butter? Better not spread it.
  29. I don't trust those trees. They seem kind of shady.
  30. What does a house wear to a birthday party? Address.

Geraldine Walsh

Mum of two Geraldine Walsh happily works from home as a freelance writer chatting about parenting, wellness and mental health.

Read more by Geraldine
{{ post.excerpt }}
{{ post.content.formatted }}

What is Family Friendly HQ?

Family Friendly HQ is Ireland’s trusted parenting community, dedicated to mums and dads, and families of all shapes and sizes.

Read more about us