You may or may not know that parenting older kids isn’t a walk in the park. I too, like you reckoned it would be a dawdle as don’t older kids like to sleep, and they can wipe their own bums too, so it is a winning combination. And yes, they can clean their bum and they do like to sleep (in most cases) but and this is a big, BUT, they do have their difficulties too.
You may or may not know that parenting older kids isn’t a walk in the park. I too, like you reckoned it would be a dawdle as don’t older kids like to sleep, and they can wipe their own bums too, so it is a winning combination. And yes, they can clean their bum and they do like to sleep (in most cases) but and this is a big, BUT, they do have their difficulties too. Luckily, as a mother to two older daughters, I am here to warn you of what lies ahead so buckle up and listen people!
- Sex is out – I know what you are thinking “is she crazy?” or “don’t you go at it like rabbits when the kids are older?” well, no or at least, a lot of us don’t! Why you ask? Simply because there is no time that a child is fully asleep especially, teenagers - they are sneaky. They stay awake until the god damn early hours when we parents are snoring, so some parent nookie is off the cards each night unless they are out of the house or at the very least tied up watching some brilliant TV show that means they will not disturb you. Did I mention that they can hear too? So even if they are preoccupied nothing deflates the mood more than the chance of kids hearing well, sounds or grunting! We are all adults here people!
- Smarty pants – They are fricken smart these young people like, seriously smart. I don’t know if it is SIRI or Alexa, but they know too much and sometimes they put parents to shame for their knowledge. Gone are the days when you told them the monster would take them away if they didn’t shut up. Now to shut them up you must be a proper parent and use specialist techniques to get them to be quiet.
- They don’t like you very much – Now I know they love their parents but like, is quite another thing and they are embarrassed by you. Parents aren’t allowed to dance at parties or anything in case their child freaks out. Parents aren’t supposed to squeeze their partners butt – yet with no sex, parents are understandably, frisky! Parents aren’t supposed to talk too much, to their friends, but just enough to get the dinner order or to deliver dessert but not too much that you get shuffled out the door by an irate, eye rolling miniature but sassy version of yourself!
- They may spend a lot of time in their room – Parents will be screaming up the stairs for the kid’s attention and who doesn’t want to watch Mulan for the hundredth time but guess what? They don’t. Their socialising with you is on their terms and you can’t push yourself on them unless you are bringing money, gifts, food, treats or a puppy!
- They hear EVERYTHING – Now you can understand, the issue with the loving at home, right? Seriously though, they hear everything and because they are smart they understand too! You literally can’t say anything around them or have a few minutes giving out about family because they hear it and understand before they judge you for it!
Written by Emma Hayes staff writer at FFHQ who also blogs at www.emmamadjotters.com.