Reasons why your kids don’t listen to you.

When you have kids you can feel like you are talking to the wall sometimes trying to get through to them...

When you have kids you can feel like you are talking to the wall sometimes trying to get through to them whether it is about something minor or more serious.
It can ultimately cause a lot of arguments at home if you and your kids can’t communicate and find ways to hear what the other person is saying by way of listening. Here are some reasons why your kid’s don’t listen to you and hopefully you can pick up some tips on how your child can be a better listener.
  • Listening is learned behaviour in the same way that we teach/show our kids to walk, talk and feed themselves, listening should also be taught. By being a good role model to your children and listening to them regularly it will train your kids to be good listeners and stop your child not paying attention to you.
  • Of course your children can hear what you are saying but they are basically ignoring your pleas to do something that they would rather not do. Hence why you will get your kids into the car for a trip to the ice cream parlour after telling them where they are going but not so much for a visit to the dentist. It isn’t fun for a child to have to do what you want and if you ask them to tidy their toys away, your child will most likely continue playing till you have to raise your voice.
  • Children have very little attention spans and if you or your partner (after asking your kid for something to be done) go off on a lecture you will find that your kiddie will just stare into space and zone out. Keeping your voice calm and authoritative (but not loud) will allow your youngster to not feel threatened or like they are being attacked for not doing a simple task. Overall a shouting match ends in the nipper heading upstairs in a tantrum leaving two very annoyed parents that feel like they are at the end of their tether.
  • Instead try asking your child to have a chat about things and how you can all come to an amicable agreement about listening by doing things that your child is asked. Make sure you have their full attention and that any potential distractions are turned off so they cannot be preoccupied with T.V or phones buzzing. Be honest and open with your children about completing little tasks that you ask to them to do and how once they are done they can have free time. Consider meeting each other half way and offer alternative times to do chores if they would rather watch a T.V show at a certain time.
  • Spend time together as a family and ensure that all the kids get ample time to chat about their day and don’t let your other kids interrupt as the key lesson here is how to listen.
  • Of course there will always be times when your nippers won’t listen to you but by demonstrating how to listen and how beneficial it is to all the family, you just might find it gets easier.


Emma Hayes

Emma Hayes is a busy mum to two girls aged 17 and 11 and is married to her childhood sweetheart.

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