How To Prepare For Being An Attachment Parent

So many parents claim to have fallen into the attachment parenting style by accident. 

So many parents claim to have fallen into the attachment parenting style by accident. Their instincts and impulses just happened to be in line with that of attachment parenting even though they were not actively trying to be an attachment parent.

But what about those of us who do know that this is the way we hope to do things? Many of us will have noticed our friends doing things in this way and will have seen the benefits first hand. By the time we’ve done a bit of research we are sold on the idea of being an attachment parent (and even we feel a bit weird writing that). It just feels like it will be right for us.

Is it possible to prepare for attachment parenting in this case? Are there certain things we can do during pregnancy, or even before pregnancy, that will make our experience of attachment parenting as positive as can be? Or, is it a simple case of waiting for the baby to come along and responding to the babies needs accordingly?

I personally think preparing for attachment parenting is a pretty wise move. The truth is that when the baby comes along your minutes and hours are jam-packed with more things than you could have ever imagined. Pregnancy is the time to get your head around some of the things you won’t have a great deal of time to explore when the baby arrives.

Let’s start with breastfeeding. If this is your first baby it’s a really good idea to familiarise yourself with the facts surrounding nursing. Reading a book about breastfeeding is a really good place to start.
I personally read a book called “baby led breastfeeding” and it really opened my eyes. I had no idea that breastfeeding was supply and demand and that the more your baby fed the greater their “order” was.
Until then I kind of thought breastfeeding was scheduled – oh how this makes me laugh now. In my defence, not one person in my life has ever breastfed so I was starting from scratch.

I would also recommend joining a breastfeeding support group as close to your area as possible. Many of these groups welcome mums-to-be as well as mothers and babies. It is a powerful experience to be surrounded by real women breastfeeding real babies. It is a great opportunity to ask questions and normalise the whole experience for you ahead of the baby’s arrival. You can then continue to go when the baby arrives.

Doing your research is also incredibly important. If you are planning to co-sleep or wear your baby in a sling or baby carrier now is the time to get your head around the safe practices and recommendations around both of those things. There are safe and unsafe ways to co-sleep and wear your baby and it is vital that you know the difference before your baby arrives.

In terms of a baby carrier, pregnancy is a good time to keep your eye on pre-loved slings on the various buy and sell pages. You can also attend a sling-meet, sling library or a shop that will be more than happy to show you how the different slings and carriers work. It will make a huge difference if you build that confidence now so that when the baby comes you can benefit from using them immediately.

Internet forums and Facebook pages are also really helpful. There are so many groups and pages advocating gentle parenting and attachment parenting. It is a really positive experience to connect with like-minded people and to hear the real-life anecdotes which will help you when it’s your turn.

Tracey is a happy mammy to four-year-old Billy. She is a breastfeeder, gentle parent and has recently lost five stone so healthy family eating is her passion! You can find her at

Tracey Quinn

Proud mum of two who got married on Don't Tell The Bride and had an accidental home-birth (loves a good story). She's passionate about breastfeeding, positive thinking & all things cosy.

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