Helping your shy child come out of their shell

Parents tend to worry about shy children however it is not always necessary

Some children are naturally shy and it can be like that forever or for a few years at least. It is a very common problem amongst youngsters and for some it will be a phase but for others it can occur suddenly from nowhere after an event in your kid’s life that upset them and ultimately triggered your nipper to go into themselves. However there are some ways you can help your kid overcome their shyness and here we have listed a few tips.
  • Build confidence- Building your child’s self-confidence is imperative when dealing with their shyness as sometimes kids are shy as they feel threatened or pressurised around others. Teaching your child to be confident can be a difficult task but with a little support and encouragement you can give them a boost, whether this is by your kiddie doing a sport they love or by playing the piano it is up to you and your nipper, as doing something they love and enjoy will bring out their confidence and belief in themselves. 
  • Practice social skills with your child- If you child shies away from large groups and avoids going to parties, encourage them to attend and practice how they can converse with others and play. Another trick is to give your kiddie a toy that they love and when other kids come over to see it, your child can use that time to tell them what the toy does and this will instigate conversation between your kiddie and the kids in her class. 
  • Offer feedback and advice- Giving your child a little advice about mixing with others and telling them that they need not hide away is a good way to remind your tiny one that you understand but you also want to help. Advise your child that they should get up and talk about their news in class after you have done something fun as a family, again you can practice at home beforehand and encourage your kiddie to open up and chat away freely in class when she gets the opportunity. 
  • Encourage your child to make friends- As a parent you can pay a big part in your child’s socialisation by promoting parties and having your child’s friends over regularly. Even if your kid doesn’t seem pushed about having pals over keep at it to allow your child to make friends and you will feel better when you know your kiddie has a friend to play with each day. 
  • Model outgoing behaviour- If you are quite shy yourself try model a more self-assured you, one that is confident and able to speak up for themselves. Remember that kiddies learn a lot from their parents so will naturally look to you for ways to behave and make sure they take you as an outgoing person!
Accept that some kids are shy, and as long as your kiddie has pals and isn’t anxious or unhappy it is probably nothing to worry about. We are all different and that is perfectly ok! 
Written by Emma, staff writer with and Irish mummy blogger. Check out her own blog at


Emma Hayes

Emma Hayes is a busy mum to two girls aged 17 and 11 and is married to her childhood sweetheart.

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