They've tried EVERYTHING and they just cannot sleep. You wish you had their problem. Bed time is a good time.
So you've come to the end of another long day of raising the next generation. Hello bed time. You've buttered bread, wiped bums and answered questions about where belly buttons and ear lobes comes from.
You're done. There is no more fuel left in the tank and you, quite simply, need some adult time and a large bar of chocolate. Unfortunately your children have other ideas. You see, there is a lengthy list of reasons why your child simply cannot go to sleep.
Here are eight ways that kids try to drag out their bed time. Do any of these sound familiar?
That word is just a trigger isn't it? A bit peckish? No. This child is positively starving merely thirty minutes after hoovering up a massive dinner. They're casually asking for raisins and bread sticks from their bed and it's just not happening.
Someone Needs A Plaster
But of course they do. Naturally the injury in question is invisible to the naked eye despite their best attempt to show you it's exact location. They're wincing and demanding a very specific branded plaster as though their life depended on it. And you've given it too.
Ah, that old chestnut. It doesn't matter that there was a pre-bed toilet visit only moments ago. They are simply bursting and it is a matter of urgency. You accompany them to the bathroom for the inevitable no-show. They've won this round.
An Important Question
There is a question that needs answering before this kid will even consider closing their eyes. They tell you it's important and you eventually cave, enter their room and find yourself talking about how halloumi is made.
A Temperature Issue
They Just Can't Sleep
They have been lying in bed for all of seven seconds before the declaration is made. They've tried EVERYTHING and they just cannot sleep. You wish you had their problem. Bed time is a good time.
They Forgot To Do Something
This is usually the time that you first hear about the form you were supposed to sign from their school bag or the random prop they have been asked to take in to school the next day. Wonderful.
They Will Miss You
And just like that, they've got you. They know how to hit you where it hurts. You'll miss them too but what part of MAMA needs her chocolate do they not understand?