Are you even a parent if you haven't seen the meme, "First child eats dirt. Parent calls doctor. Second child eats dirt. Parent cleans out mouth. Third child eats dirt. Parent wonders if they need to make dinner."
It's so true, your parenting standards slip the more kids you have, third child syndrome really exists.
Since becoming a mammy over eight years ago I have learned so much about myself, my children and parenting in general. My first-born was pretty much a science experiment, everything was trial and error with her. Visitors were sanitized, daddy was sanitized, everything was sanitized while baby number two was practically feeding himself on day two.
Want to know why third child syndrome really is a thing? Here's the truth about your third born...
- Precious first born had perfectly coordinated outfits daily. Kitted out in the best of gear head-to-toe. With your second baby, you were just going for clean. Come the third baby, you will never turn down a bag of hand me downs. Sure the baby is lucky if he or she gets dressed in their first year or at all really.
- The moment you find out your pregnant with baby number one you are pinteresting the hell out of nurseries. You spend months perfecting every last detail to come to terms with the fact that they don’t actually sleep in that room. You won’t be sweating over designs on the third baby. You will be wondering if there is any point in setting up a Moses basket or crib.
- Your first child gets an awesome baby book packed with milestones, pictures and cute little stories. Babies first smile. Babies first food. Babies first fart. The second baby gets their first curl. The third baby will be lucky if they get a rough estimate of milestones.
- When the first born dropped a soother, a toy or a teether it was boiled, sterilized and inspected over and over. Baby number three is lucky to get a little blow or a leg wipe.
- When it came to a night out with baby number one you would interview babysitters and do background checks, even if they were family. Baby number two gets thrown at the babysitter - laters baby! By the time you get to number three you are begging people to mind your kids and when they arrive you are just short of throwing your kids at them.
- When you have your second you won’t change them every single time they wake throughout the night. Baby number three gets changed when nappy starts to sag below the knees.
- Baby number one is compared to every other baby you know. You will panic if milestones are not met in a timely manner. With baby number two and three you will no longer measure your babies development against that of others. You are in no rush for the second or third baby to learn how to walk because you know that’s when all the trouble begins.
- Regardless of how proud and exhausted you were, you never accepted help on your first. You will now be preaching for any assistance once baby two comes along. By the time baby number three arrives, you will have visitors cooking dinner and mopping floors.
- And finally, by the time your second baby is born, you will no longer stress over sleep deprivation. Now that baby number three has arrived you will now accept that you will probably never get a full night’s sleep ever again.
P.S. Did I mention, I actually have four children...
Have you experienced Third Child Syndrome?