Finding the right counsellor for you can be complicated and become a long process of trial and error. Here are some tips on how to find the right one.
After all, you are about to make some big life changes with this person’s help. You will confide in them and tell them your fears, memories and sometimes things you have never told anyone else. It is utterly important you feel you can do that, and you feel like you can trust them.
You want to feel like you are being listened to and that what you are saying is being heard. Most people would feel awkward or embarrassed even to say that it is not working for them and request to see someone else, but remember this is your life, you are paying to get the help you need.
Here are some things you should take into account when choosing a counsellor:
Gender
It may not matter to some but in fact, gender does matter to most. Which gender would you feel more comfortable with? This is the first step in the right direction for you.
Ask questions
It is absolutely essential in my opinion to speak on the phone before making an appointment. If you wish, have some questions ready for them. What kind of therapy do they specialize in, where did they study, have they worked with people with similar issues to the ones you will be working through?
How do you feel?
When you do speak on the phone notice how they make you feel? How do you feel after you have spoken? If you do book an appointment, how do you feel when you first walk in and when you leave? Your gut will know.
Give it a few weeks
After a few weeks with the right counsellor, you will soon start to feel a small sense of control and positive changes. if you don’t it is probably best to move on to another counsellor.
Don’t settle
If you feel like you aren’t clicking with a counsellor, don’t settle. There is no point wasting your time and money with somebody you don’t feel comfortable with. Truth is, you may need to see a few before you find the right one for you but that is ok. Signs you may need a different counsellor can include- feeling uncomfortable with them, not feeling heard or the counsellor talks more than you do.
