The Moment I Became A Stepmum

About to be or get a new Stepmum or Stepdad? This can be quite a daunting thing to happen in anyone’s life, no matter if you are the adult or the child in this scenario.

From my own personal experience and after some months of being a ‘stepmother’, even though my now husband and I had not yet married at the time, I can recall to this day the moment the magnitude of change happening in my life hit me.

It was not, as some might imagine, the first time of meeting the children or our first outing as a family, no it was a moment whilst standing in Halfords with my now-husband, their Dad.

Yes Halfords! I was buying myself a new bicycle, a hybrid. Prior to this day I had only ever cycled racing bikes or mountain bikes and now here I am in Halfords buying a bicycle suitable for having a child’s seat on the back.

The stark realisation hit me like a brick wall. I continued with the bike and child seat choice (and subsequent purchase!) in a daze. The children (my two stepdaughters and my stepson) and my now-husband (I have to call him something other than ‘my now husband’ so let's call him Rae from here on out) were over the moon.

I too was very happy but OMG I will now be travelling around with a little person on the back of my bike! There was a sudden weight of responsibility, one I would not take lightly but had to be acknowledged. 

I should not have worried as my stepson absolutely loved going in his bike seat and on bike rides. And I loved taking him out. He was so relaxed he would sit back and happily ring his bell or honk his Postman Pat’s horn (which we had added to his seat for fun) whilst cheekily placing his feet comfortably against me as he enjoyed numerous family bike rides.

I also thoroughly enjoyed the bike rides and I got used to not only the bike but also to having a little person on the back quite quickly. Nor should I have worried about the daunting task of being a Stepmum that lay ahead of me. My stepson, the youngest of my 3 stepchildren, will become a teenager this year and still to this day enjoys many family bike rides with us, but needless to say on his own bike now! 

We have travelled a long road together and this is just one reflection but already it has gone in the blink of an eye. So try not to stress and remember it is the little things in life that truly make a big difference. 

I will happily share more ‘food for thought’ on step-parenting and the challenges faced throughout in my blog. If anyone would like to get in touch please do so via my email [email protected] 


Kathryn Maile

Kathryn Maile is stepmum to three children and mum to one of her own. She will happily share more 'food for thought' on step-parenting and the challenges faced throughout in her blog.

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