Every new parent has been there- learning to function without sleep.
Every new parent has been there - learning to function without sleep. Whether you're willing to admit it or not, every new parent can relate to these partially unpleasant thoughts that sneak into your mind when when you're woken up every hour, on the hour! You just can't help yourself. Some of the thoughts I had I feared to even publish! The common condition called “sleep deprivation” unites all of us parents across generations and lifestyles because we have all been there.
How many of these can you tick off the list?
- Is my baby just a cruel and really unusual torture device?
- I will literally pay €1,000 for a solid, uninterrupted nap.
- I think he's laughing at me now.
- How many more cups of coffee can I have before my blood becomes pure caffeine?
- I used to daydream of sunny getaways and dancing until the wee hours, now I desperately dream of the basics…like a shower.
- I swear to God, if one more person tells me I look so tired, I'm going to punch them!
- Is my child broken? Did I break him?
- Why didn't I appreciate all the sleep that I used to get before I had a baby?
- To think, there was a time I thought that cry was cute. WOW!
- Is this it? Is this what the rest of my life is going to be? No sleep?
- How did I pull those all-nighters in my younger years?
- That's it. Anyone who asks to visit the baby when they know she's sleeping is off my Christmas card list. Stupid!
- Am I the worst mum ever for just wanting a dark room all night to myself - to sleep?
- Did I really just pour breast milk in my tea?
- Lack of shut eye is definitely the strongest form of birth control known to woman!
- Now I get where my gran was coming from with the whole whiskey-in-the-baby-bottle thing.
- Do baby whisperers really exist and where the f*ck can I find one, stat!