Dealing with tweenage behaviour. It's a big change!

A tween is a child between the ages of 7-12 years old

A tween is a child between the ages of 7-12 years old that is too old to be categorised as a kid but too young to be considered a teenager. A tween can be feisty, independent and moody but there are ways you can handle their behaviour before they hit the even trickier teenager phase. Tweens often want to flex their independence muscles yet they lack the maturity to be allowed freedom as they so do wish, and this may cause conflict. Tweens expect to be given as they want and should they want to walk home from school they will feel entitled to do so. They often feel peer pressure more than any other age as their immaturity again causes them to think irrationally and they will do things in haste or to please others.
Tweens may begin to lie to you and this may cause a rift between you and push you apart but saying that a tween will still need you and your constant love and approval. Whereas a teenager will not care or give a second thought to upsetting a parent, a tween will care and will not want to hurt you or anyone for that matter. Their youth allows them to want to please their parents and gain attention for been good at things. Consistency is key when dealing with a tween as they need boundaries and rules but not ones that are easily bent for them.
Tweens are still learning so accept that a lot of their behaviour is still coming from you so be the best role model. Keep calm when stressed and deal with anger in a healthy way. Discuss things if you are not happy and show your tween to do so too. Listen to your tween and be patient, take little steps to giving your tween some responsibility and letting them show you their capabilities.
Avoid arguing with your tween aggressively and keep your tone cool when discussing. Don’t overreact to everything your tween may do wrong from time to time and keep the channels open so your tween will feel they can trust you. Listen to their silly stories and laugh together which will bond you and encourage your child to talk to you in the future when stuff may be wrong.
Stick to rules, be firm and if your tween lets themselves down remember that consequences are a way of learning how to deal with the situation better the next time. Laughing and humour is good for this age as they still believe you are the funniest person in the world but they will not like sarcasm especially at their expense!
Accept that your tween is growing up and while back chat, moodiness and lies may become a regular thing that you can manage their behaviour by rewarding good behaviour and not punishing them for little mistakes. Pay attention to your tween though you may be busy and constantly chat and keep connected. Yes, your tween may always be a bit of a handful but in time things will get better before your teen years hit in!


{{ post.excerpt }}
{{ post.content.formatted }}

What is Family Friendly HQ?

Family Friendly HQ is Ireland’s trusted parenting community, dedicated to mums and dads, and families of all shapes and sizes.

Read more about us