One mummy blogger weighs up the pros and cons
Baby G went to stay in her Nana's house recently while D and I had some much-needed husband / wife time, But since then we have spent a very tumultuous time. We have been trying desperately to re-establish the very loose routine she had prior to her visit to Nana's but very much without success. This has gone on for two weeks now and it has led me to wonder was it worth it?
I'm very lucky to have my mammy around, She is a young mammy, The epitome of maternal, my daily go to for all queries and concerns, and after having 4 of her own babies she is really the only person I am comfortable leaving G with yet. I lost the relationship with my mam for a while and I have my daughter to thank for it being reignited. She lives a bit away and we have weekly visits and since G was born she takes her overnight once a month so the sleep and alcohol deprivation in us can be satisfied. She adores my daughter and spoils her to death. No sooner have I mentioned that I need to get something for G and its reserved from Smyths instantly and provided without question. Aside from spoiling her with material things, she lavishes her with love and kisses, nana chats, late night giggles and most importantly all the time in the world! I am a lucky girl, but this also has a very big downside, The ruin of G is the ruin of her routine. A routine that every new parent works vigorously at maintaining only to be cast aside the instant nana shuts the car door and drives away with the precious cargo.
I know it's not an intentional thing, she doesn't mean to leave our house in disarray when she drops her back and honestly in those first few weeks it didn't really matter, G could have screamed for a week after coming back (which she did) but I needed that one night because I was a new mammy. I was exhausted and with a colicky baby I was at the end of my tether, and although I almost didn't let her go, and cried for two hours when she was gone, I was glad of it, I needed it, and only because of it my marriage survived! But now it does matter, now G is bigger and cuter, not in the appearance sense but in the sense that she knows! She knows nana only lets her cry for 10 seconds and then picks her up for a chat and a play, even at 3am! She knows that nana will sit for hours with her, talking and playing when it should be bath time and she knows nana will take her out for a walk on the beach when she should be in bed.This actually happened when she took her last time, I got a photo at 8.30pm of a wired looking Baby G in her buggy at the beach. She goes to bed at 7!
During these trips to Nana's, D and I usually try to do something nice, as tempting as it is to lie in bed for hours or sit on the sofa gorging on a takeaway we usually dust of our 'adult clothes' get dolled up and go out. Simple things like a dinner out are much more enjoyable when you do not have to worry about your fellow diners being put off their steaks listening to your baby as back-ground music! But is it worth it? Is it important enough to mess up the strict schedule? Are we just creating the problem because we spend weeks getting her back to normal only to get so desperate with her tantrums another break to Nanas in planned for our own sanity and so begins the cycle all over again when she returns?
My answer yes! If you are lucky enough to have someone who can take your baby for a little while then make the most of it! Sit with your husband and remind yourselves that you are so in love you decided to create a mini version of yourselves, clean out that wardrobe you have been looking at for months, get your hair done, hit the town with the girlies and just enjoy it! Remember before baby you were a person with interests other than baby led weaning and nipple shields. Tomorrow you can be mammy again in leggings and skechers and tomorrow you can get back to the routine. Nanas spend time with their grandchildren because that's one of their interests and its a treat for her as well as your child, who needs the break from you just as much as you need the break from them! So go on, phone your mam and let everyone's spoiling begin!
